no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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