How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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