East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
