I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
