And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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