Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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