Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
