Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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