I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
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