i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
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It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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