Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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