i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize