What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Houston, we have a squirter
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
