I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
