he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
