I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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