yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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