Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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