it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize