dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
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He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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