Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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