Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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