Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Drunk is not a location!
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
