i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
