You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
