She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
