Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize