I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
PANTIES FOUND
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