Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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