I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
You took a bar mat shot.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize