Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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