Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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