Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Randomize
