I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
There was a lot of him and a little penis
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Randomize