no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize