Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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