Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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