Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize