my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
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