her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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