you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
