they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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