she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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