operation have a gay friend backfired
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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