apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
