pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
