this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
