Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  Nah, we all need something.

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  (603): Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her? (1-603): Nah, we all need something. http://tfl.nu/s7fq
  Replies (24) Good night (3120) Bad night (833)
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.

  (1-514): View more from Quebec

  and?

  (514): View more from Quebec

  luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...

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  (514): so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother. (1-514): and? (514): luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne... http://tfl.nu/rdil
  Replies (48) Good night (4192) Bad night (938)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog

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  (440): I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog http://tfl.nu/h88l
  Replies (23) Good night (810) Bad night (4186)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.

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  (337): My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night. http://tfl.nu/n564
  Replies (22) Good night (5826) Bad night (840)
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  (646): View more from New York

  He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.

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  (646): He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season. http://tfl.nu/dtjf
  Replies (11) Good night (3670) Bad night (1253)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH

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  (480): West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH http://tfl.nu/ntsd
  Replies (12) Good night (4204) Bad night (1072)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out

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  (256): its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out http://tfl.nu/ng5c
  Replies (11) Good night (1429) Bad night (2811)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.

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  (812): Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad. http://tfl.nu/si1p
  Replies (15) Good night (1765) Bad night (710)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.

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  (304): I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable. http://tfl.nu/maf5
  Replies (22) Good night (4545) Bad night (702)
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  (435): View more from Utah

  honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those

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  (435): honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those http://tfl.nu/lx6k
  Replies (3) Good night (1883) Bad night (675)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.

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  (540): I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win. http://tfl.nu/n6kc
  Replies (12) Good night (1947) Bad night (493)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.

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  (202): I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas. http://tfl.nu/fady
  Replies (0) Good night (1161) Bad night (522)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.

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  (513): If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can. http://tfl.nu/a0mj
  Replies (2) Good night (552) Bad night (304)
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  (408): View more from California

  If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed

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  (408): If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed http://tfl.nu/2ety
  Replies (3) Good night (830) Bad night (353)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  The most literal cowgirl position ever.

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  (602): So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night. (505): The most literal cowgirl position ever. http://tfl.nu/yx0m
  Replies (7) Good night (570) Bad night (350)

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