i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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