Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is. http://tfl.nu/uj2o
  Replies (14) Good night (3688) Bad night (750)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club http://tfl.nu/ni5q
  Replies (19) Good night (1032) Bad night (3438)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm. http://tfl.nu/yhbb
  Replies (58) Good night (3139) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen" http://tfl.nu/6cx3
  Replies (52) Good night (9511) Bad night (910)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  $1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.

  (212): View more from New York

  Please take video.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): $1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween. (212): Please take video. http://tfl.nu/t1i5
  Replies (13) Good night (6542) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head. http://tfl.nu/67uq
  Replies (5) Good night (2883) Bad night (2004)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (514): he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come. http://tfl.nu/c1dt
  Replies (20) Good night (920) Bad night (8325)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think. http://tfl.nu/r53a
  Replies (7) Good night (1238) Bad night (2777)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail. http://tfl.nu/wcht
  Replies (4) Good night (1921) Bad night (633)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower. http://tfl.nu/z2xv
  Replies (15) Good night (1601) Bad night (953)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex. http://tfl.nu/ah09
  Replies (3) Good night (1319) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Liz is crying about burritos again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Liz is crying about burritos again. http://tfl.nu/wqr3
  Replies (6) Good night (905) Bad night (507)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee. http://tfl.nu/d96h
  Replies (2) Good night (934) Bad night (330)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot. http://tfl.nu/8yik
  Replies (3) Good night (630) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups. http://tfl.nu/fsmw
  Replies (1) Good night (318) Bad night (521)

Randomize