Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize