so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
