enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Never joke about your clitoris.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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