Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.